falling..

:)

guess the title is not correct hahaha

i don't know if i am still falling or i fell already... errr...

i am not usually like this... i don't easily fall errrr

but i am falling hard and i need an assurance that someone will catch me...
or else i will be dooomed.. haha this perpetual bliss I am feeling is not normal for me..

i am having too much attention from him and i am having mixed emotions...

i don't really know where i stand and i don't really know if he is really sincere...
i am moved... errr.. and i am still holding back my emotions..
because i still noticed that he is still attached with his exes...
tho i understand that exes can never be forgotten because once in your life..
you made them a part of you.. but still.. keep it to yourself hehehe
kasi sha he says it at times and he is comfortably browsing them online...
but i don't really care coz its his life and i still don't have any right to say anything..
well like i always think.. he is arrogant but i don't mind haha...
he really thinks highly of himself hahahaha but i still don't mind.. errr...
last time he asked me if who is goodlooking.. him or desmond...
why would you ask me that? hahah so ndi ka makamove on why tin chose desmond
over him!? duhhh?! well just to answer him secretly... desmond is a nice kid...
a very nice one... he is tall.. hehe polite...
smart and i don't know if he is funny but he is overall okay...
but if i were to choose.. hahaha feeling noh? as if  pipili tlga ako eh hahaha
il still choose mark jayson... hahaha i don't knw..
i am too much comfortable with him...
i am not really attracted by his looks..
but it just happened hahaha oh well
i can't explain it either to myself..
hahah

his birthday is coming up and he will be celebrating it in ph.. yeee... 

anyway i prepared a gift for him.. it is not that grand but its always the thought that counts?!
right?! hope he will like it

hihi.. 

hahahah it is neatly wrapped and i enclosed a small note inside :) hihi

hope it will be useful... :) i am such an uhmmm i dnt knw hahahah whatever... hope he will like it... sus ha ang effort na lang ang tignan nia sapukin ko sha eh hahahaha

will find out if what will this be... honestly i am excited to know.. am i really ready for another commitment? am i really ready to give out my heart again and trust him with all of it? i will still pray hard... :( i deserve to be happy as well but sometimes i still feel bad because i am still holding back..

i am a coward.. i don't want to confront my feelings... grrr...

but i don't need to be in a hurry..

i am falling hard and i need somone to catch me... :(

please please pretty please... don't fall fast so if someone can't catch you..

you can recover from it again.. :)

will really pray hard for my sign..

kasi naisip ko... why would i hold back pa ba?!!

if he loves me enough.. go.. haha lantod? naaah..

i am happy and he is happy..

then why complicate things?!

que sera sera.. :)